Tree of Life, Part 2

As the party climbs a giant circular staircase inside the Big Ass Tree, the tree speaks to them, saying “The crystal in the next chamber holds great power, but beware; using it transforms and ultimately kills you.  If you want to use it to defeat Windsor, you should be prepared for it to end your life.”  The party nervously looks at each other, wondering who should use the crystal when the time comes.  “… Hand Banana?” asks Drizzle.  “Definitely Hand Banana.” Replies Tao Ren.  

The thug bear that accompanied the party speaks with Fitzgerald.  He reveals that his name is Phil, and that his brother Bofa is in the next room, guarding the crystal.  He shared that it was hard growing up with those names, since their last name is “Deez Nuts.”  Meanwhile, at the base of the tree, Nyridius regains consciousness and rushes through the pit to rejoin his friends.

The party reaches the main chamber, and they find Bofa guarding the crystal.  He is joined by his loyal guards, Furious George and Sweet Green (closely related to Sweet Brown).  “Oh Lord Jesus, it’s an intruder!” shouts Green.  Combat erupts shortly thereafter.

Little Rock and Fitzgerald lead the charge, rushing head-first into the enemies.  They draw first blood by smashing Hypno-Toad, but get bruised themselves when Sweet Green hits them with cold pops.  Their pursuit of the crystal is hampered further when the floor erupts with thick, ropy vines that block any progress.  Luckily, Drizzle finds a hatchet with Fantasia-like legs.  She reprograms it to run along on its own, chopping away at the overgrowth. 

Tao Ren and Drizzle act as the scrappers, picking off the enemies from a distance.  In the back of the room, Nyridius finally joins the fight, but he is pursued by one of the shrieking flying heads from the pit.  The head gently kisses Nyridius, which causes his head to separate from his body and his ears to turn into wings; he becomes one of them.  “WHY DID NO ONE TELL ME THIS WOULD HAPPEN?!” he shouts.

Meanwhile, Hand Banana uses an amnesia field to make the enemies forget he exists.  He uses this to sneak around the room, skirting all enemies and getting within arm’s reach of the crystal.  He wraps it in a tent for safekeeping.  He gingerly moves the crystal out the window onto a branch, but as soon as he does, the tree begins collapsing around the whole team.  

Chaos erupts.  Expletives are shouted at Hand Banana.  Frightened enemies dive for cover, while others push past the party to seek their own escape.  The party drops the fight and runs toward the window, seeking to get out of the tree.  From the back, Phil the thug bear shouts “We gotta save Bofa!” “Bofa what?” asks Nyridius.  “BOFA DEEZ NUTS!!” the bear shouts.

The party finds themselves on a large tree branch, fifteen stories high, and the tree they are on is collapsing.  They quickly decide to utilize the enormous leaves of the tree as parachutes, and most glide serenely and safely through the air.  Little Rock, however, fails; he loses his grip on his leaf and plummets face-first toward the ground.