A Goodwill Tour, Part 1

Traveling with the Morganites, the party finds themselves ambushed by Horace and a small group of dildobots.  The team test out their new powers on the aggressors, exploring the extent of their abilities.  But the enemies don’t seem particularly interested in them; the dildobots attack the suitcases and trunks of the hippies, smashing them to pieces.  Inside the largest trunk they find Optimus Vine, a bizarre half-robot half-plant hybrid.  Horace calls for a cessation of hostilities and admits to the group that he was only sent to free Optimus from captivity.  Optimus shares that he doesn’t remember much, probably because he’s smoked too many home-grown herbal remedies.

Setting out on their own, the party is once again attacked.  Windsor, the pompous and self-important thorn in Gamma Land’s side, appears before the group and demands they give Optimus Vine to him.  Windsor makes it clear that Optimus “knows too much” and must be destroyed.  Although Optimus confides that he doesn’t remember a thing, Windsor insists.  Windsor reveals his backup – two tough, urban, thug-life bears.  “I’m a BEAR, bitch!” they announce.  “You don’t know NUTHIN about me!  You think I sit around, stealing picnic baskets and eating out of honey pots?  You’re WRONG… I’M FROM THE STREETS!”

The team engages the enemy.  Horace, Optimus, and Little Rock smash away at the tanks in the group while Azkadelia and Lim’Dul pick off the weaklings.  Embarrassingly for everyone, the weakest among them (Nyridius) chalks up the most kills.  Even with all of his lackeys killed off, Windsor is still dangerous; to give himself an edge, he shoots up with a needle-full of performance-enhancing barbiturates.  The team beats him down and restrains him.  At first, they try to talk sense into him, but to no avail.  Windsor rants and raves about how Optimus is the only one who can stop his plan, and he must be killed.  Windsor explains that the land needs to be cleansed with a purifying flame, and that he once knew a great warrior made of fire.  Nyridius, unrecognized, listens with curiosity. 

The party debates what to do with their new prisoner.  Optimus and Azkadelia vote to kill him, but Little Rock and Lim’Dul insist that they keep him as a prisoner.  The party concedes and keeps him tied up.  Searching for adventure, they make their way north to the giant crater that used to be Lim’Dul’s home.